When Erika Mahoney ’12 graduated from the S.I. Newhouse School of Public Communications, she had no idea that her journalism training would one day help her navigate the most devastating chapter of her own life. Today, the former National Public Radio news director has channeled her expertise into “Senseless,” a deeply personal podcast that explores trauma, grief and resilience following her father’s death in the 2021 mass shooting at King Soopers, a Colorado grocery store.
“The day my dad died, part of me died too including my identity,” Mahoney says.
The tragedy thrust Mahoney, a seasoned journalist, into an unfamiliar position. Suddenly, she was the subject of the story rather than the one covering it. She found herself conflicted when interview requests began flooding her inbox.
“I was honestly torn on whether I should speak out or not,” she says. “I had spent a decade asking people to share their hard stories with me. Ultimately, I said yes to doing interviews because I wanted to show the world that my dad was a human being who shouldn’t have had to run for his life in a grocery store parking lot.”
What began as a desire to honor her father’s memory evolved into something much larger. The shooting left Mahoney with many questions and the reporter within her needed to find the answers.
Four years later, Mahoney has created a podcast that not only tells her story but explores what she calls the “web of pain”—the far-reaching impacts and unexpected connections that extend well beyond the immediate victims of mass violence.
“I’m really asking people to walk with me from the day of the shooting through the trial and the years in between when I’m grappling with grief and trauma,” Mahoney says.
One of the most surprising discoveries in Mahoney’s journey was finding love stories emerging from tragedy. In the third episode of “Senseless,” she shares the story of Logan, a store employee who survived the shooting and helped others to safety, and Olivia, who lost her mother in the attack. The two survivors eventually found each other and fell in love while processing their shared trauma.
“So often we talk about the hard parts of grief and it’s so hard, but there are also some beautiful things to come out of it,” Mahoney says.
“Senseless” is built on a foundation of research, interviews and storytelling—journalism skills Mahoney learned in college and has sharpened throughout her professional life in broadcasting.
“Newhouse has been fundamental in my career as a TV reporter, a radio reporter and now as a podcaster,” she says. “I still have professors’ comments in the back of my head. They’re still there.”
However, Mahoney acknowledges she can’t be objective, a tenet of journalism, while producing the podcast. Sharing this personal story requires her to be vulnerable, raw and real. “It would be disingenuous to pretend that it didn’t happen to me,” she says.
The transition from daily news reporting to long-form podcasting has allowed Mahoney to explore stories with unprecedented depth. She says she’s discovered the power of patient storytelling, which has required a significant adjustment to her usual process but has proven transformative.
“What I hope people take away is that we can get on the other side of these hard, hard things,” Mahoney says. “That we can find joy again.”
She says she’s learned how to find joy through the process of producing her podcast and sharing her story. She also feels a sense of pride; she’s proud of the podcast and proud of herself for “getting back up after this.”
“I would give it all back to have my dad back,” Mahoney says. “But I’ve learned to slow down, live boldly, raise my voice. I think life is so much shorter than we really think it is.”
Check out episode 179 of the “’Cuse Conversations” podcast featuring Mahoney. A transcript [PDF] is also available.
